Are you putting pictures on the Net? Read this.

My problem with several pictures on the Net and specially in Facebook and other Social Media spaces are that they are crooked or unclean … or they are not put straight (and often at 90° from the original) … and are left with poor colours when they could be rectified and made so much better.

We've all seen these and more

Colours Changed

Picture where you have to bend your head

Crooked picture

This one is seen very often

PLEASE PUT THEM RIGHT

You can use Lightroom, Photoshop, and a number of other tools - many of them Free, like Preview (on a Mac) and many on Windows (can a friend please identify them; I am a Mac user). Colours can be corrected or rectified in some of the mentioned software.

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Another problem - and now seen most often as we put up old pictures we find in our homes, or are computer scanned - is the degree of distortion or spots or colours there are in the one we find. 

I found this in my old family collection

Of course you could go to a photo shop and get it fixed, for a price, but if it's not something you'd do, and I certainly won't, you could try and clean it up (partly!) and make it into a Black & White image and put it on the Net.

This is what I did here

FINALLY: Please do label it - even partly, if you don't know the names of everyone. Someone on Facebook, or wherever you put them, might recognise the others and add to your link.

In the above picture (from March 1913) starting from the left, are Safdar Ali (my Dada), Shahid Hosein (a friend of my Dada and married to my mother's cousin whose children included author Atiya Hosein and Pakistan's brilliant Air Force Pilot Fuad Bhai); Sitting as a Child was Rishad Bhai (the elder brother of Atiya Hosein) who was also India's Ambassador to Sri Lanka; Bilquis Phupi (my aunt who died very young) and Mahlaqa Begum (my Dadi).

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Also, take a look at flickr. It's great. Use it.

Read (and hear) this — and tell me what you think

I am not a believer in supernatural things

but I had to write this … and play two audios for you.

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Perhaps you can tell me what you think is wrong.
Or right.

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I had a maid that we employed.

Her name is Zahida.

She has a husband and several children.

The children include a married daughter … who has 5 children.

This daughter had terrible anaemia

and has been given blood several times.

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But that did not cure her 'actual' problem …

A few months ago Zahida took leave to go to a Pir Sahab's Dargaah because her daughter was now speaking in a lisping voice and made strange noises. The girl said in a pseudo-masculine voice: "I am a 'Hindu' who has taken possession of this girl".

Every time there was a Qavvaali she'd listen for a bit and go into a Dhammal (a dance that happens at every Pir's grave) and would fall flat on her back by somersaulting really high. No hurt, though. She'd get up and do it again. And again. Until she fell asleep. Then the 'Hindu' would go away and she'd wake up and speak normally for a bit. Then the 'Hindu' would be back.

I told her, "Pir to mar gaé haéñ. Voh küchh naheeñ kar saktay. Doctor kay pass jaao." (The Pir is dead. He can't do anything. Go to a Doctor.)

My wife also set an appointment for her to visit a Psychiatrist. But Zahida said that Doctors can't help. "Yeh to 'andar' ki cheez haé." (This is an 'inside' problem.)

Zahida's husband had been well and used to drive a borrowed Motor Rickshaw. He had suddenly stopped eating - except for very small things - about 7 months ago. He was getting weaker. He left the Rickshaw and refused to work, lying in bed all the time. Made the family even poorer. That was another thing that the 'Pir Sahab' had to 'cure'.

Zahida left and came back.

This is what she said.

A few days later she brought her daughter to my house. She spoke with a childish lisp. Often it was difficult to understand. I said at one point , "Tüm zameen par baéth jao, baytee". (Sit down on the floor, girl.) She yelled, saying "Maén 'Hindu' mard hooñ. Baytee kyooñ kah rahay ho?" (I am a Hindu Male. Why are you calling me a girl?)

An hour later Zahid came up and asked me to play Qavvaali music as the girl wanted it and was shouting in the kitchen. I went down and put on my iPod. Within minutes she started trembling and then started to jump. I saw her do this three or four times. She'd somersault really high and land on her back … and then would do it again.

I came up (also feeling a little scared that she'd damage hair back). After 20 minutes Zahida came and said I should shut off the music as she was asleep. I did. In a few minutes she woke up and held her mother and said "Chalo". (Let's go!)

A month later Zahida went back to the Pir with her daughter.

When she came back, this was her story.

I am still sure that this is not really possible.

The beatings and the cruelty that the daughter received at Pir Sahab made her scream … but the Pir said (and Zahida thought) that it was the 'Hindu' that was screaming. Imagine being beaten with your hand twisted behind your back. Constant pushing and thumping on your head and back. Hitting.

The chimgaada∂ story is a figment of Zahida's imagination (as it was for the attending team). That's obvious. But was the girl putting all this on? Was the father putting all this on, now that he is well again and has got a job?

Sounds so strange.

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As far as I am concerned, Zahida firmly believes everything that has happened … and says so. The Pirs are tricksters, there is no doubt. Nothing will help the girl in the long term, I am sure.

Unless she is somehow part of the trick.

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FOUR MONTHS LATER UPDATE

Zahid says her husband is well.
So is her daughter.
The Pir Sahab's Chayla (Student!) has done his work.

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I await your response!

Please stop these idiocies …

Please use the right pronunciation.

(Otherwise you'll be treated like Mumtaz Qadri fans!)

Lahore to vaaqai Lahore haé

The most important thing for me was Nirala Sweets in Lahore, after they took there Karachi shops away. I loved their Sugar Free Barfis, their Sugar Free Laddoos, and their Sugar Free Gulab Jamuns. The Gulab Jamuns were so good that even my non-Diabetic friends loved them much more than the regular types.

A few months ago I went to Lahore and went off to purchase the stuff. No shops. Asked a few friends. They said they've been closed for a while.

I wrote my regrets on Facebook and Hareem Sumbul replied that they had been closed, like many others, and will open in a while. It was just a Kitchen problem that they had to solve according to Ayesha Mumtaz of the Punjab Food Authority.

This time I went in, hoping, and my Facebook tells the story.

I rang up Chashni and they said they have the three Sugar Free things, too. So off I went on my way to the airport to collect them … and found they were great. So that's a place where you all should go when you need Sugar Free sweets.

(They also have other sweets which were good, too. I tried quite a few. Yes, yes … I have Diabetes. But I am 75, so I can't really be bothered by a few sweets once in a while. I mean how fast will Death approach me if I occasionally have them, yaar. At this age many of my friends are dead, even without Diabetes. Also, I am only taking things away and providing very little to the Society at this age. So its OK to occasionally beat the system before it beats me.)

Right. So, off I went to the airport, walked right in to the Passenger Lounge, turned towards the toilet — and Lo. And Behold. This is what I see there:

(Sorry. I had to write that on their pic.)

I was surprised. No one among my friends who travel often to Karachi had told me that Nirala does exist at the airport. So I walked up to the shop and the guy said they had no Sugar Free stuff any more. Not in their airport shop, anyway. Airport shop?

"What? You have other shops in town? Where?" 

"Sir, they have changed their name, now. Its called Chashni."

"Oh, so the Chashni I went to is really Nirala. Great."

"They don't say that, sir, because Nirala has not paid Taxes. So they've changed their name."

"Really! Then why is this one not called Chashni?"

"Sir, when they send us the money we'll change it, too."

Things work if you have the money. Otherwise they don't. But who cares?

What's the truth, then? I think it is a family business, like Farhat Shereen said. And the members have fought. One group will now be called Nirala and the breakaway group will be Chashni. (And the guy at the airport shop should not have told me, whether its true or not, about the tax that was not paid.)

Bye, Lahore.

The plane that was to go at 6pm, didn't. I changed my airline and got another flight at 10pm. Went out for Coffee and a (sugared) snack. Came back and boarded. Slept all the way through, but just after I tried to stand up and put on the airplane's seat belt. They are right. You can only sit down and put them on.