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Monday, October 09, 2006

Yaqeené Mohkam ...

The ad below appeared in the Dawn (October 8, 2006). It was brought to my attention by The Loan Ranger, Naeem Sadiq. Yaqeen Curriculum Development urgently requires female composer for institutes of high repute in Gulshan-e-Iqbal and Gulshan-e-Jauhar. ELIGIBILITY

  • Education...intermediate
  • Typing speed...60
  • 2 years experience in composing graphics
  • Command over Inpage, MS Office, Corel, Photoshop
  • Fully SHARIA & SUNNAH compliant
  • Practicing Muslim with correct AQIDA
  • Purdah observant with NIQAB
Some of the readers of this blog may wish to take issue with Yaqeen if they find such requirements to be discriminatory. Others may wish to apply for the job. I understand that the cream of the chosen candidates will be assigned to work on the organization's forthcoming magazine, Prayboy.

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Blogger Jawad Zakariya said...

Un-freakin-believeable! I don’t want to go into the obvious avenues available here, because this is such a gimme it would be unking on my part. I did visit their site and most of the links don't work (I'm guessing on account of my browser, Mozilla), but I found this to be of interest. Quote from the Yakeen web site:

The following Hadith is appropriate and be fitting:
“Everything in the world is cursed except students, teachers and those who are with them.”

The hadith is awesome (I love the 'BE FITTING' part too, very Shakespeare!) Mind you, I don't exactly understand what it means, for example, who are the people WITH students and teachers? The Janitors? and where EXACTLY are they with them? But I find it fascinating to see who is and is not included in these religious sweeping statements. This one curses (presumably to Hell) all those who are in some way not related to students or teachers. Well I sneak in (insert Hindi Film Villian type laughter here), ‘cause both my parents are teachers, but I bet most of your gentle readers ain’t so lucky.
I’ve always wanted to write a research paper which gathers all such statements including or excluding various parties from sundry favours by the Almighty. I’m too lazy to go and actually do the work, but my bet is most if not all of humanity would find themselves excluded from the heavenly abode on some pretext or another. Anyway I thought of applying for the job, being free these days and all, but I’m not quite sure what ‘correct AQIDA’ means. Oh well, back to the jai namaz for me.

09 October, 2006 11:07

Anonymous Vickram said...

Just thought your Gentle Readers might be interested in this explicit submission for the centerpage foldout in this exciting new publication... please don't trample down my garden path in your rush for more of the same.

10 October, 2006 08:01

Blogger Zakintosh said...


now if there'd been audio accompanying your pic, it would have had a voiceover saying, "obviously man does not live by beard alone ...?

10 October, 2006 10:38

Blogger Heretic said...

Hilarious, this right-of-middle path machinations. Guess we're doomed as a populace to suffer more of this ilk. Best of luck to you brother mine. And yes, thanks for the appreciation of the poetry. :-)

10 October, 2006 10:50

Anonymous en-light-ened woman said...

@vickram: Typical bloody male chauvinism: - Keep your partners on the dark!

10 October, 2006 17:32

Anonymous The SPC Team said...

" ... and those who are with them.”

In OT terms this means: Illam iaculis vulluptatum altarusim od dolumsan nim quatums inceptos, donec Epiph-anus neque dolessed.

That's Pope-Talk for "Meet me behind the Altar, Choirboy, and you will be in Heaven!"

The Choir of San Pedofeelus

10 October, 2006 17:49

Anonymous Vickram said...

@en-light-ened woman: Partner, I wish I could truthfully say, that was not my dog!

12 October, 2006 00:01

Anonymous en-light-ened woman said...

@vickram: The underlining of 'my' fooled me into believing it's a link. But nothing happened despite several clicks. Sure hope the dog had a better time.

12 October, 2006 07:37

Anonymous rayhan said...

"Anyway I thought of applying for the job" Huh? A female named Jawad Zakariya? What next?

12 October, 2006 10:55


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